A True story minus the Lie's

[plarfman]

I awoke next to the Barman In Min-Cho, I found him to b more comforting then the invisible Mektoubs who kept steping on my head while I slept. Stretching I looked about it was a new day with which to spread my fashion consulting knowledge in a Peaceful way. I checked with the Barman to see if he had any booze yet....he did not and I was sad. I walked up the steps and out into town the usual members of Infinity where dashing about. Over by the stables I spotted Baldy in the nude rumaging through his favorite packer (packer2). I decided to head that way.

[josephm]

Ahh the feel of a cold brisk wind running through my underpants. What a morning. I was brushing down my favorite packer, Packer 2, when I noticed some Visc sap I'd foraged the previous day on the ground. Searching my actual packs for broken seams I learned that Packer 3 (My least favorite packer) had chewed a hole in in Packer 2's packs.

Of course this meant Packer 3 had to be punished. So I got out my GIGANTIC TWO HANDED SWORD OF MEKTOUB SLAYING...

[plarfman]

As I got closer I noticed Baldy looking about Packer2 he then turned to Packer3 who was his least favorite and started shaking his fingure at the packers face while a stream of Zori curse words exited his mouth. I even thought I head him use the word Tryker. He suddenly Reached down and withdrew a Gigantic Sword and started waving it about while shouting more harsh words. I was slighty stunned and stopped.I began rumaging in my pockets for a gun knowing this could get very ugly if the mektoub decided to turn Invisible and attack!

[josephm]

Fortunately for packer (1...2...5...three sir! oh right!) 3 I had just bought my sword off Fuzz and it was at the moment much much to heavy to use. I prepared a devastating overhead cleave but the sword tilted my body backwards and my fleet flew up into the air! I had cold mud all over me!

"Ooh Packer 3! It's all your fault!" I exclaimed.

I lept to my feet and promptly slipped and fell again.

[plarfman]

I watched the sword as it arched up,up,up....thud! Baldy lay on his back in the mud while packer3 kept munching on some sort of cloth material. How could this happen Baldy was a Strong Individual who had taken down many an innocent creature. There Was only one explanation....packer3 was a witch. While Baldy lifted his sword Packer3 had used its witch magic to make Baldy fall. I yanked out my gun pointing it at the packers head, sweat dripping down my face I moved over to Baldy offering him a hand to get up, My eyes never leaving packer3 who stood chewing that peice of cloth.

[josephm]

Suddenly a hand was thrust into my face, and unfortunately for that hand my rage was unleashed. My first thought was "Tryker!". Those impish little devils must have set Packer 3 up. I hate Trykers! I hate hate hate them! Well...they taste good, but I never would have tried one if I didn't hate them!

The little devil was about to pay! I moved to block what must have been an oncoming slap and struck out with my foot, kicking Mektoub 3 in the groin. Packer 3 lept over me in the direction of my attacker emitting a fearful bray along with it's foul Slaveni breath.

[plarfman]

OMG packer3 charged me his huge mouth opening and emitting what smelled like a dead Tryker. My eyes went wide, It was a witch. I wipped my gun around and BAM! BAM! BAM! I fired into its hiddious face forgetting there where no bullets as I didnt have time to harvest the day before. WHACK it hit me in the chest and I was knocked flat into the mud several hoves stomping on me. I let out a cry of Panic and scrambled to find my gun in the mud...How had it not died I shot it 3 times in the face?....could witches be killed by bullets?....was my creditcard in the mail? these thoughts flashed through my mind as packer3's hoves smashed my body deeper into the mud by the stables!

[josephm]

Packer 2 stood nearby, what a good packer he is! And I was able to use his packs as hand holds to steady myself on my feet. I noticed Packer 3 still going wild, thrashing the body underneath and sending mud everywhere.

"Bad Packer 3!" I shouted, waving him off. "You'll spoil all the good Tryker meat! You idiot! I'm going to feed you to a kincher!"

Packer 3 shied off, his eyes rolling uncontrollably. I should talk to that stable boy in Zora. He sold me the craziest, stupidest packer he had. 'Oh well' I thought, I did get a good discount on him.

Walking carefully so as not to loose my balance, I picked up my sword and headed to the bloody gasping Tryker. Where had he learned Zorai? And why was he cursing at Packer 3? It was his own fault his ploy failed. Packer 3 was just a pawn, a very bad pawn that was not getting any supper tonight.

[plarfman]

Suddenly the pounding of hoves stoped. I could not see anything what with being coverd in a think layer of mud and muck. I pushed myself up and with a giant sucking sound I was on my feet. I swung my arms around trying to find somthing to hold onto and felt a thud as I wacked a soft somthing...was it the WITCH! panic swept my body and I swung a fist in the direction i had felt it WACK!!!! contact. I heard some zori curse words....The WITCH packer3 could speak zori, this was indeed bad news I began trying to wipe the mud off of my face so I could find my gun and Unload on the soft squishy animal.

[josephm]

The Tryker was obscenely tall, which meant I must have been mistaken and it wasn't a tryker at all! It was hard to tell because he was still covered in mud, unless...Sweet Kami it was the KING OF THE TRYKER!!! I freaked out..not physically but in my head...I mean I really freaked out! Had he come to avenge all the Tryker vassals of his I had eaten? Did he know a majority of my jewelry was made from the ears of his kin?

WACK!!!! The evil king struck out at me and I staggered back into Packer 1. Packer 1 is an ok Packer, He carries all the heavy stuff since Packer 2 doesn't deserve the punishment and Packer 3 doesn't deserve the responsibility. Anyways, he holds my magical amps in a side pocket so I wrestled one out, all the while keeping my eyes on the Tryker King.