I QUIT!
Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2004 1:14 am
HAHA MADE YOU LOOK!
j/k
Page 1 of 2
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2004 3:04 am
Got my hopes up
j/k
j/k
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2004 3:52 am
Yes and I don't know why other than to see who was leaving and what lame reason it was.
glad you aren't leaving
glad you aren't leaving
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2004 9:05 am
Can I have your stuff?
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2004 10:52 am
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2004 5:03 pm
Trindle wrote:Good One!
Got a chuckle out of me, even at 6:00 AM.
Thanks
I agree, it was worth a good laugh.
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 4:48 pm
Dateline Noobi Desert:
Investigators found the corpse of a charred human just off highway 51. The body was holding on to the exposed electric cord of a computer monitor. Later parts of the rest of the computer were found in the debri area. It is believed the corpse and computer system must have been deposited to the desert floor from about the height of 300 meters.
Captain Rudolph spoke to this intrepid reporter about the findings. When asked about the possibility that this player had once played an MMORPG, the Captain was quick to comment:
"I think the operative word is played, past-tense. From what we can tell, this guy's hard drive had MMORPG written all over it. He had at least 5 MMORPGs installed. We cross-referenced that with his Visa card bill. Yeah , he was broke."
"What did you make of the tattoo on his right cheek?"
"The one on his butt. Well, it's definitely not self-imposed, he wasn't any gymnast, more like a couch potato. We matched the cast from his broken derriere to the impression in the LazyBoy he used while playing Saga of Ryzom."
Asked if the corpse had any clues as to the reason for its death, the Captain was adamant.
"We suspect suicide. This guy posted on just about every board out there, even the Walmart complaint board, which we just learned comes out of Beta as an MMORPG next week. It seems he liked to say he was leaving , then start up a new character and then remain in game. But time was against him fiscally."
Asked if there was any chance of murder by hire, the Captain made clear that the investigation was showing it was much more involved than that.
"I think it is fair to say that he was seen as an undesirable by his peers. Look he was yanking their chain, using up valuable board space and so even the GMs and server techs hated him. It became a bit of a silent war. Unfortunately, he didn't change his tactics when he joined the Walmart Beta. That's a very different and dangerous crowd. We do suspect some Saga of Ryzom players actually played Walmart as well. They are a pretty rough crowd, you don't want to ride your Harley with that crowd."
While a Gila monster was chewing on his tibia, doctors dusted his entire body for anything to prove that he had been at the local Walmart. It seems that players meeting other players was a very common thing at Walmart.
"This Joseph character, the corpse, well he liked to talk about his tattoo and wear very little clothes. It's true that that alone would make a potato the object of derision and escalate to violence, but we still believe that it really was about ... well a fight over a pair of Joe Boxers. "
Investigators believe that JosephM went into Walmart that day hoping to meet some fellow players in a surreptitious attempt to acquire the Harvesting Tool of the Magi. Such in game trades for real money are common amongst the wannabee elite of MMORPG gaming. The soon to be corpse was dealing with a ring of Walmart gamers. Unfortunately things went awry.
"The trade was supposed to go down at sundown. Unfortunately, JosephM decided to come inadequately dressed, which was his trademark. It also exposed his trademark tattoo. Several of the members of the money for game items Walmart Ring, including the manager of the gaming department, recognized JosephM, the soon to be corpse, from the tattoo on his buttocks. He had shafted members of the ring on U-Bay, when his card had bounced payment. The rest was predictable. They chartered a helicopter from a nearby cattle ranch and proceeded to bounce his credit card over the Noobi Desert."
Officer Raymos filled in the rest of the story.
"He was not on vacation in Noobi. Someone had attempted to remove his tattoo by using sandpaper, however the sandpaper was not hurt in the process. He was definitely a player, he'd lost four girl friends over the last half decade, none of whom decided to come to identify his body until we upped the reward to 50 cents. It's really a world tragedy. Guy gets into gaming, gals get miffed, guy gains weight and finally gets killed, while gals date, make a family, and get paid 50 cents to identify his bod and snicker with laughter, that is a whale, thank God, thank God!"
Public Relations Officer Zuzie Raymos then began to discuss the "Feminine Mystique" with this reporter, I mentioned I was due back at HQ to post this story, and weasled out of the obligation. The blonde is definitely high maintenance.
Asked if the highway would be clear and open for the afternoon rush, we were assured that frankly no one really gave a damn, and we'd be able to even litter on that site by then. I noticed them taking down the yellow police tape as I went to my jeep to hose myself down.
JosephM ... we once knew ye ... welcome to Walmart.
Investigators found the corpse of a charred human just off highway 51. The body was holding on to the exposed electric cord of a computer monitor. Later parts of the rest of the computer were found in the debri area. It is believed the corpse and computer system must have been deposited to the desert floor from about the height of 300 meters.
Captain Rudolph spoke to this intrepid reporter about the findings. When asked about the possibility that this player had once played an MMORPG, the Captain was quick to comment:
"I think the operative word is played, past-tense. From what we can tell, this guy's hard drive had MMORPG written all over it. He had at least 5 MMORPGs installed. We cross-referenced that with his Visa card bill. Yeah , he was broke."
"What did you make of the tattoo on his right cheek?"
"The one on his butt. Well, it's definitely not self-imposed, he wasn't any gymnast, more like a couch potato. We matched the cast from his broken derriere to the impression in the LazyBoy he used while playing Saga of Ryzom."
Asked if the corpse had any clues as to the reason for its death, the Captain was adamant.
"We suspect suicide. This guy posted on just about every board out there, even the Walmart complaint board, which we just learned comes out of Beta as an MMORPG next week. It seems he liked to say he was leaving , then start up a new character and then remain in game. But time was against him fiscally."
Asked if there was any chance of murder by hire, the Captain made clear that the investigation was showing it was much more involved than that.
"I think it is fair to say that he was seen as an undesirable by his peers. Look he was yanking their chain, using up valuable board space and so even the GMs and server techs hated him. It became a bit of a silent war. Unfortunately, he didn't change his tactics when he joined the Walmart Beta. That's a very different and dangerous crowd. We do suspect some Saga of Ryzom players actually played Walmart as well. They are a pretty rough crowd, you don't want to ride your Harley with that crowd."
While a Gila monster was chewing on his tibia, doctors dusted his entire body for anything to prove that he had been at the local Walmart. It seems that players meeting other players was a very common thing at Walmart.
"This Joseph character, the corpse, well he liked to talk about his tattoo and wear very little clothes. It's true that that alone would make a potato the object of derision and escalate to violence, but we still believe that it really was about ... well a fight over a pair of Joe Boxers. "
Investigators believe that JosephM went into Walmart that day hoping to meet some fellow players in a surreptitious attempt to acquire the Harvesting Tool of the Magi. Such in game trades for real money are common amongst the wannabee elite of MMORPG gaming. The soon to be corpse was dealing with a ring of Walmart gamers. Unfortunately things went awry.
"The trade was supposed to go down at sundown. Unfortunately, JosephM decided to come inadequately dressed, which was his trademark. It also exposed his trademark tattoo. Several of the members of the money for game items Walmart Ring, including the manager of the gaming department, recognized JosephM, the soon to be corpse, from the tattoo on his buttocks. He had shafted members of the ring on U-Bay, when his card had bounced payment. The rest was predictable. They chartered a helicopter from a nearby cattle ranch and proceeded to bounce his credit card over the Noobi Desert."
Officer Raymos filled in the rest of the story.
"He was not on vacation in Noobi. Someone had attempted to remove his tattoo by using sandpaper, however the sandpaper was not hurt in the process. He was definitely a player, he'd lost four girl friends over the last half decade, none of whom decided to come to identify his body until we upped the reward to 50 cents. It's really a world tragedy. Guy gets into gaming, gals get miffed, guy gains weight and finally gets killed, while gals date, make a family, and get paid 50 cents to identify his bod and snicker with laughter, that is a whale, thank God, thank God!"
Public Relations Officer Zuzie Raymos then began to discuss the "Feminine Mystique" with this reporter, I mentioned I was due back at HQ to post this story, and weasled out of the obligation. The blonde is definitely high maintenance.
Asked if the highway would be clear and open for the afternoon rush, we were assured that frankly no one really gave a damn, and we'd be able to even litter on that site by then. I noticed them taking down the yellow police tape as I went to my jeep to hose myself down.
JosephM ... we once knew ye ... welcome to Walmart.
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 5:26 pm
LMAO omg that was a funny post....knowing him IRL makes that post even more funny hahahahha!!!
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 9:14 pm
Especially since I'm always naked! that was great!
Re: I QUIT!
Posted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 9:21 pm
josephm wrote:Especially since I'm always naked! that was great!
You should put your pink armor back on and go wave to some kinchers...dont worry the Pink will confuse them and they will b harmless to you!