Ryzom

well mates - i feel some kind of inspiration these days

here is the Chapter VI of "The Kitin Scriptures"
hope you like it

It does not end with a cliffhanger like the previous two nor does it put an end to my tale so enjoy...

Since the forums are back - like I promised here's Chapter VII of "The Kitin Scriptures"

enjoy

PS: As i mentioned before I amnot a native speaker so if any of the native speakers could correct my stylistic and other mistakes I'd be really thankful
*hugs all*

The Chapter VIII of "Kitin Scriptures" is out...

This chapter explains what has been done to the half zorai half Kitin scholar Dai Xielu, speaks of the intricacies of inter-genetic surgical operations and mentions "The great Mind" for the very first time.

enjoy


PS And no, the "Great Mind" is not Sunce

Whoa, becoming ambitious now. These kitin seem much more intelligent than Nevrax ever had them in mind. Looking forward to reading more about how you envisioned them.

Lemme guess - "becoming one with the Great mind" was their way of saying "we'll kill you"?

Oh, one note though. Be careful with the structuring when, like now, you have a person telling a story about a person telling a story about how he told something. It quickly gets confusing.

Good job, Komi, love how the plot gets more and more complex and slightly mystical. Don't stop.

sidusar wrote:Whoa, becoming ambitious now. These kitin seem much more intelligent than Nevrax ever had them in mind.

Lemme guess - "becoming one with the Great mind" was their way of saying "we'll kill you"?

Oh, one note though. Be careful with the structuring when, like now, you have a person telling a story about a person telling a story about how he told something. It quickly gets confusing.

Well It's not exactly the Kitin themselves who are so intelligent... But the truth will reveal itself later

Your guess is not quite right - if they kill you - you respawn at the nearest portal... Unless they dissolve your whole body in acid... But that is not what was meant either. This "Great Mind" will be a very important "character" (if I can name him so) later...

Yes I noticed this overcomplexity and made slight corrections. It's a technique widely used in arabian fairy tales - like 1000 and 1 night But I shouldn't misuse it I guess I'll try to be more careful - thanks for correction.

To Faa: Thanks In fact it will get a lot more complex even

yes... no using your powers for evil
*head explodes*

Wonderful story though